Cold Feet
by BarbedWhire
Summary: What if there's a new edge to the Rise of the Guardians? What if a new threat invades their world and turns it upside down? What happens when a troublesome girl enters their lives and changes them forever? The Man in the Moon has reserved plans for all of them. Some will live on. Others must die in order to save us all. Rated T for possible coarse language/violence
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hellooooo people! This is my first story EVER on FF because I **

**finally decided to start a story, so some feedback would super awesome! People I have reviewed will know me by the name "BigB". Only my name is now BarbedWhire (because I am not only freakishly tall but also have hair that's wild and that stings) In this first chapter the character isn't Jack Frost or anyone you know yet. You'll find out HER name (emphasis on HER *ahem*), in the next chapter.**

**Enjoy! R & R! **

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I stared at the greyish-blue hue of the sky above me as I lay down on my back, ignoring the wet grass on the field. I could not bring myself to do it. The idea seemed foreign, a stranger coming to take away my relatively peaceful state of mind.

I could not bring myself to go home. After several years of boarding school, in a place miles away from home, you'd think I would be without a doubt overjoyed to see my family again. But I wasn't. I knew I'd feel horrible as soon as I did and that I'd never feel in the least bit in my element. If I so much as shared that thought with anyone, they'd probably look at me as though I were some sort of strange extraterrestrial descended from a world of heartless beasts. Usually home is where, well... you feel at home. It's where you can be comfortable with relaxing and being who you are. Where you can just toss your schoolbag onto the floor after a long day of school, throw your socks aside and probably forget where you put them afterwards, lie on the couch, raid the refrigerator and completely shun your homework. It's where showing off your inexcusably rude bad habits is acceptable, even laughable.

Only in my case, that was not the way things were. I'd feel at home anywhere but at home. Just like right now, in my favorite place in the world. I feel just fine lying on this wet grass, shivering as the cool autumn air caresses my bare skin and contemplating the fast progression of the setting sun, its now docile rays kissing what part of the sky remains its territory with fiery colors. I was in a place where I belonged. It was nice to be back _here, _at least. I sighed and spread my limbs lazily across the high grass. It swayed to the gentle rocking of the wind and tickled my cheeks. I could always not return home and simply stay here for the night. If it weren't for the rational part of my brain that told me I'd probably freeze to death, I would've done it without a second thought. Besides, I didn't come all the way from Boston to Burgess in a ten hour bus drive just to freeze my butt off.

By now, it was already quite dark outside. The sun's rays were barely displaying their show in the sky anymore.

_Just five more minutes_, I thought, closing my eyes. Suddenly, I heard the shrill chirp of some bird. What kind of bird sings this late? My eyes blinked open just in time to see a blackbird swoop gracefully overhead. I could only distinguish its dark lithe wings thanks to the movement of their flapping and the yellow in its eyes caught the last rays of the sun. It chirped again when it saw me and fled into the darkest part of the forest, where the sun did not dare venture itself. I could still hear its cheery singing echoing in the darkness.

The lyrics of a song started playing in my mind without a warning.

_Blackbird singing in the dead of night._

_Take these broken wings and learn to fly._

_All your life, you were only waiting for this moment to arise._

I chased the words of the song from the edges of my memory. They were too painful to bear. I got up reluctantly, like some groggy student waking up and realizing it was Monday. The sun had now completely left our world and gone to sleep. I didn't mind, the darkness didn't intimidate me. I knew the way through the forest and back home so well. I could get there wearing a blind fold and not trip or smash into a tree even once.

I picked up my small suitcase and jogged across the field, the full moon greeting me with its gaze. It almost felt like it was grinning down at me, encouraging me to embrace the fact that I had to go home. It bathed me in a pale glow and lighted my path. I quickened my paste, trying to get the 'getting home' part over with.

I heard the blackbird sing a long eerie note, its voice emanating from some part deep in the forest, taunting me.

_Blackbird fly._

_Blackbird fly._

_Into the light of the dark black night._

The moon seemed to glow brighter at that moment, but I chased the thought away. I was only creeping myself out. I ran faster, and the blackbird's cries faded away. The memories faded away.

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**A/N: So what did you peeps think? Any feedback is seriously needed! I'mnot forcing anyone to review or anything but... ya know. For me? *puppy-dog eyes***

**What I mean is that it would seriously help. Constructive criticism is strongly appreciated and suggestions too. I have a lot of plans for this story and my Plot Bunnies have only just started to gnaw their way through...GNOM GNOM GNOM! and they are so very hungry...**

**Anywho, TRY reviewing please! **

**Byezees!**

**- BigB**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N Hello again guys! Or whoever is reading... I didn't get any reviews at ALL last time and I don't think anyone even read my story :( But then again, I have no idea how to check views. Anyway, I need to know my voice is being heard here, so if you read this and appreciate it or can give me any constructive criticism, PLEASE DO IT. Enjoy the read (and the review)! :D**

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**Third Person P.O.V**.

Jack lay across the highest branch of his favorite tree. It was an old oak tree and existed since he could ever remember; it was there when he was first reborn from the icy lake. In fact, it was only a few feet away. The tree had always been there for him. Unlike the mortal humans and the memories that had fled from his grasp during his resurrection, the big oak tree had always had a branch to lean on, a perch to look out from and a soft patch of branch to sleep on. Though the bark was old and rough, it had a uniquely sweet wild smell to it that he loved. It was the best home he'd ever had in his 318 years of existence. Other than North's workshop, of course. But sometimes it felt nice to go back to where life as you knew it started. Where you could take a break and not have to worry about anyone barging in without knocking or otherwise having to do any chores as a punishment for pulling pranks on certain Easter kangaroos… not that he had anything to do with anything.

Jack swung his leg back and forth lazily, arms resting under his head as he controlled the winds surrounding the area. It was a fun thing to blow the browning leaves off the trees and blow them about in a crazy dance, preparing for the upcoming blizzard he was cooking up for the children of Burgess. Soon enough, they'd be granted a wonderful snow day. And he'd make sure it was on a Monday too. Instead of sitting around in a classroom all day and dying of boredom, they'd all be playing and horsing around in his snow, happily dying of cold. But that wouldn't happen, of course, since he'd keep them warm by playing pranks on them and starting unexpected snowball fights. He wasn't called the Guardian of Fun for nothing.

Jack's reverie shattered when he heard a sound that would have been inaudible to any normal human being. Only he didn't fit in that category. It came from far down below and the sound was rushed and constant, twigs and leaves crunching as it progressed. Footsteps.

Jack sat up and directed his frostily blue gaze towards the source of the sound in annoyance. Who in their right mind would still be stumbling around the forest at this time? Jack ordered the winds to cease and everything fell silent. All but the sound of some bird, _a blackbird_ he thought dismissively, singing. Squinting his eyes in the darkness, he tried to detect any unusual movement.

A girl.

Jack frowned. She ran through the sinewy and treacherous path in the forest as though she had done it hundreds of times before. But as savvy as he was about who went into these woods and when, he had never seen her before. Had he?

Jack leaped from his perch on the highest branch of the oak tree, calling out to the frigid winds to enlighten his descent. He landed silently on the considerably lower branch of the neighboring maple tree. Craning his neck, he made a last attempt to identify this unexpected visitor.

She must have been around sixteen. Her long brown hair cascaded in wild curls and flew as she ran, many strands rebelliously defying gravity. The mane of hair surrounded a small round face. The light cast by the Man in the Moon made it almost translucent. What struck Jack the most were her grey eyes. They had an ever- present whimsical expression to them. But if he looked more carefully, there seemed to be a tormenting storm displaying behind those eyes, dark clouds shrouding them with feelings he knew all too well. Doubt and insecurity. Loneliness.

Jack couldn't resist his burning curiosity. He carelessly flung himself down to a lower branch. The whole branch shook and many twigs snapped, causing a big racket.

The girl bristled and swiveled around to face him. She showed no sign of seeing him, Jack noted with frustration. She only seemed appalled. Why was she so damn serious?

"How many times do I have to tell you to leave me alone, you stupid bird!" she shouted in his direction angrily. She picked up a dirt-caked rock the size of her palm and flung it at the tree. The volatile snagged Jack's arm painfully and he cried out, caught off guard, and fell off. He managed to call the winds before he fell and prevented his butt from being studded with thorns from the thickets bellow. The blackbird's song ended.

_Man that girl can throw hard when she's angry, _he thought, rubbing his arm and groaning grumpily. _What idiot guy decided to dump her this morning? _Jack thought for a moment. _Nah, can't really blame him._

The girl – no, the blood-thirsty beast - smiled in satisfaction, chin haughtily lifted in triumph, and turned around to continue her journey through the forest.

Jack gritted his teeth and scowled at her retreating back. If he weren't so cold, his eyes would've burned two holes into the back of her head.

Jack puffed. What the hell was her problem? How dare she mistake him for a bird? He could move giant gusts of wind that could blow away any old lady unlucky enough to carry an umbrella. He could cause full on blizzards that could easily morph snow days into snow weeks and turn any child's frown upside down. Heck, the only similarity he had with the bird-brained species was the ability to fly! Nonetheless, Jack Frost was no meaningless avian and he was going to show this ignorant "girl" the amazing non-bird related things the Guardian of Fun could do.

A snowball appeared in Jack's hand by simple willpower. With a practiced and merciless hand, he chucked the volatile right at the back of the girl's head. It shattered from the force of the contact with a heart-lifting _splat _and the melted snow trickled down the girl's sweater. Jack's face split into a wide grin at the sight of the expression of bewilderment on her face. She must have been shocked and downright freaked since she couldn't see him and snow still hadn't fallen in Burgess. Her legs seemed to be working on hyper drive as she sprinted away. Jack was laughing so hard it brought tears to his eyes.

"Are birds where you come from this amazing, girly?" His voice broke as the end of his sentence and he burst into another fit of giggles.

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**First Person P.O.V. (like in first chapter)**

I only realized how stupid I'd been once I got out of the forest. In that split moment of irrationality, I had actually thought the damn blackbird had thrown the snowball at me.

_Stupid, stupid, stupid…_

It was obviously some weird person wanting to play a prank on any wandering person, not to mention that I had thrown a rock at him/her. The creepy dork probably took a bit of snow from their freezer. I ignored the part of my mind that told me that the snowball would've melted a while ago.

My _house_ was now only a block away. There's a big difference between a house, which is the actual infrastructure, and a home. I slowed my pace since I felt safer here. _Oh yes, _I scorned myself,_ by staying in a populated area, _anyone _will be able to hear my screams if I get attacked by some puny bird._

Now I had time to think, not that I hadn't done a lot of that for the majority of my day. I had to think of an excuse for being two hours late from coming back. Possibilities ran through my mind at top speed. I was usually good at making up stories but my mind was too fuzzy and agitated to think of any award-winning excuse.

Now that familiar feeling returned to haunt me. Cold feet. It's quite ironic since my feet were actually burning from all the running. In contrast, the rest of my body was a hollow void of cold. I didn't want to move. I didn't want to make any decisions. I didn't want to continue along this road that would lead me to who knows where in my life. The only thing I knew was that whatever I did now was going to affect the rest of my pitiful existence. They should have called that feeling "Cold Soul".

It was too late to turn back since I had already started walking up the driveway. Here I was. Butterflies couldn't describe the feeling in my stomach. Killer bees were a lot more appropriate. My legs felt like Jell-O as I dragged my feet up the front steps, trying to tilt my chin up and puff up my chest to boost my confidence. The only thing I didn't fail at was tripping like some clumsy old oaf. I hauled up my very small suitcase with all the belongings I had brought from boarding school. I tried to flatten my messy hair. Second time I failed in the same two minutes. I brushed off the strands of grass and the bits of dirt from my jeans. I still didn't feel ready. I pushed the doorbell anyway.

The front door opened almost instantly to reveal my mom. Her warm brown eyes beheld me for a moment.

"Welcome home, Alice" she whispered. And she pulled me into a hug.

"Thanks Mom" I muttered. Finally, an excuse was not needed in this situation.

She pulled me into the house, shutting the door behind us and smiled at me kindly, not uttering another word. Her eyes devoured me with their gaze, and I tried hard not to meet it.

"Alice"! The voice of a child cried behind me.

I turned to see Jaime, his eyes shining like a supernova. We embraced each other for who knows how long.

"Hey, little brother", I said, kissing the top of his head.

Little Sophie dashed around the corner and jumped into my arms, her blonde hair was messy as usual and sticking all over the place. At least we shared that gene.

"Sophie miss you big, Awie," she said in her small high-pitched emotion-induced voice.

"Awie missed you too, Soph", I laughed, feeling elated at the sound of that nickname she'd given me ever since she'd laid her big green eyes on me.

Those eyes reminded me of someone I tried so hard to forget, but at the same time was too afraid to. My hungry eyes searched the room in vain for that person, even though I knew I'd never see him again. And I was to blame. Our father was dead because I had killed him.

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**A/N I forgot to ask you guys last chapter: did you recognize the writer(s) of the song Blackbird? Without researching it? 'Cause if you did, you didn't miss out on a lot in your life and I am proud to call you a cultivated humanoid ;D**

**I'm gonna let you guys guess who it is...**

**And I also left you peeps on a cliffy here. :D I LOVE CLIFFIES :D But only when I make them.**

**Anywho, PLEASE REVIEW THIS. even though i'm not forcing you to. I will keep on writing this story even if you don't. 'Cause I'm that awesome.**

**BYEZEES!**

**-BigB**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N Hey Strangers! Here's my next chappie. I'm sorry if this is going a little slow and if you think this is going nowhere, but this is like a filler chapter. And so is the next one, though that one is a lot more interesting.**

**And thank you so much KateriImagine, you were my first (and only :P) reviewer on this story! Congrats, and I appreciate it so much! I followed your advice about posting the point of views and such, so thanks and I'm so happy you like my fanfic so far :D**

**So please, the rest of you, R&R! I need the advice! Enjoy! :DDD**

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**Third Person P.O.V.**

Jack couldn't believe his eyes. His fingers automatically drew puzzling and confusing designs on the window pane, reflecting his own feelings. It was that weird girl again! Only this time she was sitting at a dinner table, eating with Jaime, Sophie and their mom.

Jack scowled in concentration, pressing his hypersensitive ears to the window pane and attempting to get nips and bits of conversations, in search of answers. Jaime's and Sophie's backs were to him, while the girl and the mother's faces were obliviously facing his. All the better; his cover wouldn't be blown since people couldn't see what they didn't believe.

Finally he could make out what they were saying.

"So, did boarding school do you any good, Alice?" Mrs. Bennett said gently.

"Yeah, it was alright Mom. My marks weren't too bad. They barely let me cross a toe out of the line when it came to coming into class only five seconds after the bell rang. If we so much as sneezed after lights out, Mr. Asterix would be all like "Straight to the dog house, ya filthy rascals. And bring yer pillows with ya." And I also made a few friends." Alice said it as though the whole line was practiced beforehand. Her smile was almost salesperson-like.

"That's nice, sweetie. I'm really happy for you." Mrs. Bennett beamed at her daughter. "I can't wait to see your report card."

Alice's smile fell, replacing it with a nervous frown.

Jack felt his heart leap in his chest as he recalled a single word. _Mom. _The Alice girl had called Mrs. Bennett "mom". Then that could only mean…

The awkward silence at the dinner table was broken by Jaime.

"So Sis, did you get us anything while you were gone?"

Alice's lips curled into a mysterious smile. "Maybe."

The two younger children understood that as a "Yes, but only when no prying adult eyes are around". They jittered excitedly in their chairs.

Jack didn't need any more proof. This violent humanoid was related by blood to Jaime and Sophie and lot more so than he would have liked them to be.

He unstuck his ear from the cold glass and looked one last time through the window. He eyed the girl carefully for any telltale signs that she resembled the least bit to the Bennett family. He found none.

All he found was that same sense of insecurity and uneasiness he saw in her grey eyes earlier. Wasn't she happy to see her family? He'd do anything to be in her place just now, with a family of his own. Jack found himself envying the girl and disliking her for such an attitude. Who did she think she was, taking advantage of something he would never have? He had lost his family and couldn't even remember their names. He would never see them again or rather see more than his sister's face. Having North, Sandy, Tooth and Bunnymund as a family was great, the happiest time he had during his second life. But he doubted it was the same as having a mother, father and siblings. He didn't even know what it was like and it was frustrating.

Those depressing thoughts paused as his eyes locked onto something he hadn't grasped earlier. The girl's hair was on fire.

Not literally, of course. But in the lighting of the dining room, some strands of hair that he had thought were brown were now ignited in fiery red, the rest a warm auburn. The fact that her hair was a wild mass made them look like flames frozen in time.

As if Jaime had sensed Jack behind him, he turned toward the window. But Jack had already fled into the night, leaving a trail of snowflakes behind him in a wild storm of wind and ice.

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**Alice's P.O.V.**

I sprinted across the hall as quietly as I could, knowing that they could find me any second. Then I would be done for.

As I was only a few feet away from my old room where I could hide, a blood curdling war cry resonated behind me.

"ARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHH"

I was caught!

Then, the stomping of wild feet could be heard and I ran faster. I could easily outrun the wild beast chasing me. I was almost there when I slipped on an object lying around the floor. A Tonka Truck. I landed on my back painfully and groaned. Stupid Jaime. How many times do I have to tell that dummy to pick up after himself!

The wild stomping stopped near me.

_Crap_, I thought. The beast was airborne.

A warm body landed on my stomach and all the breath was knocked out of me.

"Gotcha" chirped a sing-song voice.

"Get…off…, Soph", I gasped.

Sophie giggled and hopped off me.

Jaime rounded the corner, his grin like the Cheshire cat's.

"We won so…time for our presents", he sang happily.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "The Tonka Truck was a really cheap shot, Jay".

Jaime gave me an overly innocent look. "What do you mean? You're the one who should watch where you step."

I snorted. "Yeah, well you _knew_ I was going to fall over it."

"Well I'm sorry Al, but I have no control over your clumsiness". He shrugged but a mischievous glint passed through his eyes.

"Whatever" I retorted, rolling my eyes. "I'll give you sickos your presents then."

I walked the rest of the way to my room, pretending to be mad when I was actually happy to be with my siblings again. Even though I still didn't feel good about being here.

I went through my unpacked suitcase. I knew exactly where I had put their presents, but I stalled to build some suspense.

"Now where did I put those silly gifts… ah, there they are."

Iwalked out into the hall, the mysterious gifts hidden behind my back.

I looked at their expressions carefully. Sophie was grinning widely in anticipation, squirming around and bouncing on the palms of her feet. Jaime stared at me with wide expectant eyes, trying to stay calm. The fact that he was biting his lip and wringing his wrists was betraying his excitement. As they already knew, my presents were known for being strange and unusual.

I pulled my hands from behind my back to reveal a small stone in one and a sharp-looking fang that was about half a foot long in the other. I had carved it a little to have a hilt, like a dagger. Of course, I had made it a little blunter than it was initially. I gave the opal to Sophie and the fang dagger to Jaime.

The two younger children stared at me questioningly, probably wondering what their psycho sister had cooked up for them this time.

I pulled them into my room, popping my head into the hall in search for any spying eyes or eavesdropping ears (notably adult ones), then shut the door behind us.

I turned to them, grinning excitedly.

"What _is _this, Al? Who am I supposed to _kill_ with this thing?"

"Why you get Sophie a rock, Awie?

I dodged the questions, proceeding to the story behind those objects.

"Watch", I said.

I turned off the lights, to which Sophie protested by shrieking. I covered her mouth quickly and pointed to the "rock" in her hands.

It was now glowing, lighting the darkness with a rainbow of blue, yellow and purple, but more noticeably an orange-like red.

Sophie's green eyes reflected the mélange of colors but more brightly still reflected her wonder.

"Shiny", she uttered in a daze.

"What is that?" Jaime wondered aloud, amazement projecting out of his eyes.

"It's a fire opal" I said proudly. "It's very rare. It glows in the dark because it's magical".

I was lying of course. There was a scientific explanation for the rock's glowing. It simply absorbed the sun's rays during the day and kept on reflecting them even at night. A sort of mineral inside the opal made it do that. I just wanted to make my brother and sister happy and encourage their imagination, that's all.

I switched on the lights and the glow of the opal disappeared.

"And this", I said pointing at the fang, "Is the smallest tooth of a monster I slayed back at boarding school."

I watched them absorb all the information, their naiveté was endearing. I told them of the monster that haunted the woods around the area and sometimes came at night to eat the student's toes while they slept. They only noticed in the morning when their toes were bitten off, since the monster's magic fang (it only had one that was magic) was so sharp it could cut cleanly through anything and no one would even feel it. I told them I went into the forest at night to hunt it down so I could slay it and steal its tooth. It was a horrifying story for them, but it had a happy ending in which the opal had such a pure light that it blinded the monster (it hates the light) so I could kill it.

The true story was that I found the opal near a stream. It was quite out of its place. I don't know how it got there. I stole the fang of the who-knows-what from grumpy Mr. Asterix, the janitor and caretaker of the school. I snuck into his office because I had wanted to know more about him since he was such a strange, isolated man. We students all made fun of his comic book name. What he hid in that office seemed quite suspicious to me, but all I found was the fang in a locked drawer to which I picked the lock, so I took it. I nearly got caught right in the act, but I managed to get away. Anyway, Mr. Asterix was a pretty big hairy fellow, so I wasn't too far off from the monster part of the truth.

"So there." I said happily. "The opal is a wonderful talisman that can ward off evil monsters afraid of light. It also works as a great night light. But remember, it needs to lie in the sun for the whole day for better magical quality! As for the fang, you can defeat any monster with one slash. The blade will only obey its wielder's orders if the latter has a truly brave heart." I winked at Jaime.

"Thanks so much, Ally", Jaime said, wrapping me in a hug.

"Thanks", Sophie cried and jumped into my arms too.

"You're welcome, guys", I laughed. "It's getting late. I think you should both go to bed."

They groaned and whined but I managed to push them out of my room. Their steps faded away and I was left in silence. I flopped onto my bed, not even bothering to pull on my pajamas, and almost instantly fell asleep.

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**A/N i know I know, pretty boring. Next one will be better. i only got one review last time (thanks again KateriImagine, you made my day) so my goal is to get at least one more. Do the math. TWO IN TOTAL AT LEAST. That's all I want and you peeps will make me very happy if you do. **

**you don't have to, but whatev. I'm doing this story for people to read and give me feedback for my writing career, not 'cause I have all the time to waste and because I like going to sleep on school nights at 11:30 pm. Go figure.**

**Enough of my ranting, see ya peeps ! i'm not mad yet! :D**

**Hugs and Boogers,**

**BigB**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N There you go! I posted this fifteen minutes after the 3rd chapter. (pffft, don't be silly I don't write THAT fast). I just initially was going to put it all in one chapter until I realized it was WAY too long -_- **

**So here you are and I hope ya like it! It's still filler. OOPS, i think I used that term in the wrong way... by filler I mean information and crap not stalling or i'm out of ideas or anything. I'm so tired, I have no idea which one it means! but anyway maybe the next chapter will get a little more interesting... R&R POR FAVOR!**

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**Alice's P.O.V.**

I woke up to find myself surrounded.

Fire. Fire everywhere.

My frightened gaze beheld the evolving inferno before me, the dizzying swirl of flames devouring everything in its path like some great hungry beast, becoming bigger as it ate to the song of its never-ending hunger. The heat was unbearable and the flames licked the furniture surrounding me before swallowing it whole. I wondered if that was how a turkey felt when it was popped into an oven. And this is what it was. My house had become an oven in a matter of minutes. How had I not noticed this before?

I burst into a fit of coughs, realizing that the oxygen in my lungs was quickly being pushed out and replaced by all the black smoke clustering the area. I had to get out of here. Fast.

I slid off my bed, stumbling and tripping over the covers, leaving dreams of flying horses and fantastic worlds behind for a horrific nightmare.

I rushed toward the bedroom door and flung it open to reveal another set of crumbling flaming walls.

"Mom! Where are you?" I shouted.

There was no answer and throughout all the burning heat, I felt the cold hand of fear suffocating me with a feeling of dread. I turned toward Jaime's neighboring room, but the closed door was surrounded by a wreath of flames.

I ran down the hall only to find a barrage of fire blocking the stairway to the first floor. I was trapped. I ran back down the hallway and tried opening a door, only to be burned by the coal-hot brass doorknob. Coughing from the oppressing smoke, I pulled my shirt up to bloke it and sprinted toward another door down the hall. I couldn't tell what room it was, the fire was deforming and destroying everything, disorienting me. The doorknob was not as hot and I threw myself inside. The angry flames tried to enter with me, starving for a new source of oxygen, but I shut the door before they could enter. I realized this was the bathroom. The air was better here, but it wouldn't be long before the bathroom would be gone too. I would go with it.

"Help!" came my strangled cry. "Someone, please, I'm in the bathroom!"

There was no answer, no reassuring voice. Only the roar and the sizzle of the cruel fire. Only the sound of walls and furniture crumbling to ash kept me company.

I let out an agonizing scream, my lungs working at full power, trying to be heard. Smoke had started filtering from under the door and I backed away. I tried turning on the tap water and the water in the bath in guise of meager defense supplements, but the pipe works seemed to have given in. I didn't dare turn on the lights in fear of an electrical short-circuit and only causing more fire, so everything was pitch black. And I was suffocating.

Suddenly, the door burst open in a humongous clash that made my ears ring. A dark figure appeared, making a terrifying contrast with the flames surrounding it. I screamed in terror at the frightening image and just as quickly started choking and coughing from all the sudden smoke in the bathroom.

"Alice, is that you?" the dark figure gasped. It too seemed to be missing oxygen, but I still recognized its deep warm voice.

"Dad!" I cried happily and flung myself into his arms.

He held me tightly, his grey eyes studying me and checking for any wounds.

"We need to get out of here fast, Alice. You've gotta trust me and do whatever I tell you to do. Promise?"

I nodded quickly, not measuring the gravity of his words and unknowing of the nature of what I would have to do. I was only happy that he hadn't burned in the fire.

He picked me up in his arms and held me securely before running toward the stairs.

"They're blocked!" I gasped.

He tucked my head into his jacket to protect me and jumped over the barrier of flames. I screamed as we tumbled down the rest of the way. Stairs gave way and split into pieces, but we still made it to the bottom. Dad landed on the bottom floor with a groan, I on top of him so I didn't get the worst of the impact. We were covered in black soot, but none of our clothes were on fire.

"Come on Ally, get up." Dad yelled urgently over the roaring fire. He grabbed my arm to help me sit up.

We crawled our way through the house, covering our heads with our shirts to protect us from the crumbling ceiling. A whole flaming chunk along with our chandelier fell inches in front of us and we crawled around it. We dodged holes in the floor, masses of fire and dozens of objects that nearly crushed us.

My Dad and I were not too far from the nearest exit anymore. Only now a grand chunk of the floor had disappeared and fallen into the basement, leaving a giant crevice that stretched from one side of the hall to the next. It covered the whole width. It was too large to jump across or to go around. And it was too late to turn back and find another exit. Windows were out of the question; they were all guarded by fire or too small.

"Al! Remember when I told you to trust me?" Dad shouted. His voice broke as he started coughing roughly.

I nodded anxiously. My head felt like it was pounding like a hammer. My heart's pace was on a runaway train.

I could see my Dad's forehead creased in worry and beaded in sweat as he said his next words.

"I'm going to throw you to the other side of this hole and you'll have to jump at the same time."

"That's insane! What about you?" I wailed, already hating that idea.

"I'll be just fine, Ally", he said in a soothing voice. "Hear those sirens? They'll find me eventually. What's more important right now is for you to get out of here." His eyes shined as he looked at me reassuringly and he smiled at me. He laid a kiss on my forehead.

"Now, hurry up. There's not much time", he urged me.

I didn't stop to think for longer. I had a strong feeling of hope springing inside of me and the thought that the both of us wouldn't make it out of here alive was unthinkable. I had to trust Dad. If I couldn't, then what other choice did I have left?

"As soon as you get to the other side, I want you to run out as fast as you can. Don't look back." Dad said calmly, nudging me toward the edge. The fire crept closer behind us.

"On three. One, two… THREE!" He bellowed as he threw me with all his strength.

I landed hard on my stomach and the hot wooden floor knocked the breath out of me. I had made it. My legs were dangling in the pit of fire, but I managed to hoist myself up. Climbing trees all the time had its benefit.

I crawled halfway to the door, then couldn't help but look back even after what Dad had said.

I could even see his exhausted but definite grin from where I was. I waved at him happily. I had made it!

All celebration was cut short when I heard a grand grumble. I realized it was coming from the house itself. The house shook and groaned. I heard wood splitting and the fire hissing louder than ever.

Suddenly, a humongous fiery chunk of the ceiling above crashed down onto where my father was standing. I stared on in shock, not processing what I had just seen.

"DAD!" I screamed.

Impossible.

My stomach spilled its contents from the previous Mac n' Cheese dinner that now seemed to have happened ages ago. My head pounded harder still as if a giant fist was punching it repetitively.

The world around me was fading. My vision was filled with the monster that had swallowed my father. All I saw was fire. There was no escape. The surreal hot spikes of color filled and danced in my vision tauntingly. All of a sudden, it was as though someone had put a blanket on top of the world and turned off the fire. My vision went black.

* * *

I woke up with a shudder and sat up straight in my bed. My back was streaked in cold sweat and my breathing was loud and heavy, as though I had just run a marathon.

The nightmares were back. Every time I was back in my house, I dreamt of that night. The night my father died.

My nightmares were almost always the same. They were rarely distorted figments of my reality, but simply painfully horrible flashbacks of what had happened nearly five years ago.

My father had truly died in that fire and I had seen it happen right in front of me. I was completely helpless and incapable of helping him. The firemen saved me when I was on the brink of death. I had woken up a five days later in the hospital. I wish I could say the same for my old man. He burned to ashes among the other things lost in the fire like some insignificant piece of wood. And it was all because of me. Not just because I couldn't help him, but because I had caused the fire.

I had lit a few scented candles that night of the seventh of September, even after my parents had specifically told me not to. I liked the scent of lavenders that those candles emitted so much that I couldn't help myself. I had also wanted to prove them wrong about me being unable to handle candles by myself. Being a twelve-year-old girl who just so happened to be the eldest child in the household was supposed to be a good enough excuse for doing 'grown-up stuff'. Instead, I had proved them right. I had sneaked a few matches out of my Dad's supply drawer while he was asleep and had forgotten to snuff them out afterwards.

It was because I was distracted by something that night and, ironically, I can't even recall what it was. It must have been something pretty meaningless yet it caused something so tragic. Somehow, I forgot about the candles and went to bed straight afterwards. Sometimes I wish my stupid subconscious would simply make me dream of the unremembered distraction instead of haunting me with unforgettable memories. But knowing how unhelpful it's been after five years, I can't really expect it to give me any answers now. Plus, I wasn't even sure I wanted to know what happened. What good would it do me now?

My mother, then seven months pregnant with Sophie, had left for Jaime's appointment with the doctor out of town. Since she was supposed to get an ultrasound for the baby, she conveniently took Jaime. Dad was left with me at home. Mom and Jaime must have been pretty surprised to come back and see that the whole house had burned down. Apparently our old smoke alarm had taken a break during the whole time.

They had rebuilt the house and we had moved back in six months after the fire. It wasn't like before, yet it was pretty similar. I wished we could have moved somewhere else as to not have to pretend that nothing happened; as though the remains of my father and our former house weren't buried under us.

After the incident, my mother had paid for a therapist so I could start taking sessions. I learned that I have acute stress disorder which in turn leads to insomnia from all the nightmares and my worrisome state of mind. The word "stress" says it all. My heart rate and my stress level can heighten quite fast for even the smallest of things. Doctor Coney has helped a little, but not as much as my mom hoped. My marks went from straight A's to straight D's. I got into fights at school and had mood swings constantly. That lasted for two whole years until Dr. Coney had one of his _genius_ ideas.

Dear old Doc, whose words are like sacred scripture to my mom, suggested I take some time off to some strict and remote boarding school somewhere pretty far away from home. It was supposed to help me "build character" and cease my mood swings or at least make them become less frequent. I could start fresh, make new friends and actually share a room with them. And that in turn would boost my marks up. For once, I didn't disagree with him.

For the past three years I've been going to Easton-Mount Preparatory High school. I stay there for most of the year and only come back for Christmas break and summer vacations. My marks had gotten a lot a better, even though the "making friends" part was barely a success. I'm still unhappy and depressed even when I go there. You can't exactly forget your father's death.

But I like it better that way. Not because I hate my family but because I feel guilty. I feel guilty for having taken my mother's husband away without even having given them a chance to kiss one last time. I feel ashamed when I look at Jaime's brown eyes who had not had enough quality father-son time because of me. I feel horrible when I see fatherless Sophie who never got the smidge of an idea how great the man who had given her life was. My stomach buzzes and flips every time I think of seeing them. Sometimes I think that they're somewhat happier when I'm away.

I'm a constant reminder that someone's missing. And I don't mind that they do like it better when I'm gone. They are happy to see me but probably only for a short period of time, even if they don't say it. It shows in the way they sometimes look at me, like I'm some burden or some stranger in their home. It's understandable, though. A murderer cannot ask for anything more.

Every time I come back, the memories flood in and drown me, terrorizing my conscious and unconscious mind. The nightmares come non-stop; the nights are longer and even more restless than they are at Easton Prep. The void in my chest becomes an emotion-absorbing black-hole and it will only be soon until I sucked in too.

I had made the biggest mistake of my life too soon. I became a pyro maniacal murderer at only twelve. And to think life had just started. Sometimes I wish, even in my dreams, that I could just take a huge eraser and wipe out my mistakes. Then I could just rewrite the whole story to make it have a happy ending. Then, I could feel my Dad's arms hug me and warm me up in my permanent state of cold and hear his voice sing to me again. Then, my Mom and my siblings would actually want me around. Then, I could have a _home_ again. The worst part is knowing that there is no such eraser.

Instead, I have to watch the whole scenario replay itself almost every night while I'm here, powerless to make any alteration. I have no control. My life is a never-ending display of my mistakes. I'm already prepared for a long chain of sleepless nights.

I get up to shake off that energy-depressive train of thought. I walk, half asleep, to my bedroom window and stare up at the pale glow that the moon's face sheds. I sometimes talk to the moon and it makes me feel better. Somehow, it's as though I'm talking to my father. Strange as it seems, the moon is like a long-lost parent. It stays there forever, watching over us with a soft keen eye. No matter what mistakes you make, it's always there for you, waiting. But waiting for what?

"Hiya" I said softly. "Why are you staring at me like that?"

There was no answer from up above, not that I expected one. The moon continued smiling like it always did.

Out of nowhere, I started hearing the lyrics of the lullaby my father used to sing to me as a child for the second time this night. Like before, it played in my mind. My dad was a huge fan of the Beatles.

_Blackbird fly._

_Blackbird fly._

_Into the light of the dark black night._

This time I didn't mind as much. The nightmare had already finished.

I pressed my cheek against the cold glass, eyes drooping from fatigue. I didn't mind falling asleep here. I felt much better.

Through the crack of my eyelids, I thought I saw a frosty design slowly but fancily covering my window as though an invisible hand on the other side of the glass were drawing an icy wonderland just for me.

"Pretty", I muttered hazily before completely drifting into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

**A/N UUgggghhhhhh, i'm so tired! it's already 11:00 pm where I am and I have to wake up at 5:30 am like I always do to get to school -_- it's a private school and they also give me lots 'o' yummy homework...**

**Did you peoples enjoy this chappie? If so, please tell me. Any review will make me not fall asleep in class tomorrow. It'll make me so happy i'll be hyper :D**

**so review. if you don't i can't do much to get my revenge on you except to make my pencil monkeys attack you... MWAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAH. and they are hungry to meet you, Shim :P (shim means both 'she' and 'him' since i have no clue **

**wether you're a boy or a girl and i don't want to be called a sexist)**

**BYEZEEES AND HUGS & BOOGERS**

**BigB**


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